Spanish help, does my essay make sense?

What I don’t want is for someone to completely do this for me, when doing this essay i think i may have used phrases that make sense in English but not in Spanish. I didn’t use a translator but i used a dictionary and I don’t think that the phrases I used translated well. Can someone tell me: one if my essay is complete garbage and two if there are any websites that I could use to help with this problem?The essay in Spanish:Cuando era ninò, yo vas a la fiesta del me primo. Va el fiesta, hubo un piñata grande y muchos globos rojos. Cuando se tiempo de romper la piñata, me hermano para empazar. Cuando se rompió la piñata, todo el mundo corremos la dulces en la centrò de el suelo. De repento, mi hermano y yo corremos se encontrò con. Me Hermano encontrè a me y el se cayò, despues el empezar llanto. Hubo un momento miedo en mi vida. What I was trying to say (in English):When I was a boy, I went to my cousin’s party. At the party, there was a large piñata and lots of red balloons. When it was time to break the piñata, my brother began (I was trying to say went first). When the piñata broke, everyone ran to the candy in the middle of the floor. Suddenly, my brother (this is the phrase I was most afraid of) "ran into me". My brother hit me and fell down, then started crying. It was "a very scary moment in my life".P.S. If this essay is hopeless, then please tell me so, that would help me more than correcting it for me.

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2 Answers to “Spanish help, does my essay make sense?”

  1. unrioted says:

    Nope. If you’re writing in the imperfect, write in the imperfect. Match your verbs to your subject. You can’t spontaneously put a tú form with yo, or the él form, and you can’t use the present to express the past. You haven’t used phrases that make ANY sense! fiesta is feminine…VA doesn’t mean AT. dulces is plural. There is no such word as CENTRÒ….There is NO accent on the word, and no such thing in Spanish as an accent like this: ò. EVER. You use it three or four times! It’s niño…no accent, ~ .repento isn’t a word that fits there. “se encontró con”….what does that mean? You need to check things over again. This time, apply what you have learned in class.Encontrar does NOT mean to collide. miedo is a NOUN, scary is an ADJECTIVE.

  2. volente says:

    Well you almost got it right but a lot of the sentences are not correct. Just a few words are being said in the present instead of the past tense. Its a good try with out using a translator. Well if you need some help let me know :)