How good is this essay? Opinions would be nice!?





I had to write an essay on the most influential thing or person we studied this year in American history and I chose Susan B. Anthony. Its due tomorrow and I really need some kind of feedback. So if you could just read over it and give me any advice on it that'd be so helpful! Susan B. Anthony Women have tons of rights in the United States right? Women didn’t always have that many rights in America. Back before the 1900’s, women only had the right to marry and give birth to children. Many women worked hard to get the same rights as men. There was one significant woman who worked extremely hard…Susan B. Anthony. She was truly the most influential person we studied in American history this year. Would women have the same rights if it weren’t for her? Anthony spoke at campaigned for women’s property rights in New York, spoke at meetings and collected signatures for petitions. Susan B. Anthony attended her first ever women’s rights convention in Syracuse. Anthony was introduced to Elizabeth Cady Stanton. Together, they founded the American Equal Rights Association. They began working on The Revolution(a newspaper) in Rochester, NY. Their logo was ‘Men their rights, and nothing more. Women their rights, and nothing less’. In 1869, Anthony and Stanton founded the National Women’s Suffrage Association(NWSA). It was an organization dedicated to gaining women’s suffrage. In the early years of NWSA Anthony tried to unite women into the labor movement. Anthony campaigned for women’s suffrage on speaking tours in the west. On November 18, 1872, Anthony was arrested for illegally voting in the 1872 Presidential Election. Anthony was tried and convicted 7 months later. She was fined but refused to pay the bail. The trial gave Anthony the opportunity to get her voice heard to a wider audience than ever before. There were two women’s suffrage organizations, NWSA and American Women Suffrage Association(AWSA)merged together forming the NAWSA. Anthony campaigned in the west to make sure that territories that gave women the right to vote, hadn’t blocked them from the union. Susan B. Anthony died 14 years, 5 months and 5 days before the 19th amendment passed. The 19th amendment gave women the right to vote. Its also known as the Susan B. Anthony Amendment. To remember Anthony, she is now on our $1 coin. Could women really have the same rights if it weren’t for Susan B. Anthony? As you can see, Anthony fought hard for the rights of American women. Although she didn’t live to see the results, she had a huge impact on it. Some people would say that she wasn’t the most influential person we studied in American history. Without her, women probably wouldn’t have the same rights they have today. Susan B. Anthony was truly the most influential person we studied this year in American history. Thanks!



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7 Answers to “How good is this essay? Opinions would be nice!?”

  1. LU-SLIP says:

    I really think you did a good job it’s nice and longshe should give you an A+lol

  2. greenage says:

    A proper essay needs to sound proper. Your introduction sounds sloppy and needs to be more formal, as opposed to what you have which sounds way more laid back. Going from paragraph to paragraph, at the end of each one, it should somehow link to the next one. Do a bit more research too. There’s a lot that you haven’t covered and it isn’t all that long.

  3. brehon says:

    It’s terrible.It’s not even in any logical order, overall it’s atrocious. ******* blacks these days….

  4. flflags says:

    It’s barely decent if you’re in middle school. Otherwise, it’s very childishly written, has a very weak thesis and conclusion and very little organization. There are also spelling and grammar errors.A few specifics. Don’t keep asking rhetorical questions. Don’t keep changing “person” — write in third person not first or second. Try outlining your points and then do a rewrite.I do applaud you for doing your own essay however! Keep at it!BTW: The person who said this was good because it was long is only trying to get you to write his poem. LOL He blocked me for telling him not to cheat. Awe … I’m heartbroken.

  5. notesid says:

    A formal essay is just like it sounds, formal. Never start en essay with a question, especially one that sounds as colloquial as these. Also, I cannot look at your introduction paragraph and find your thesis statement. That’s a big problem. Make your thesis and your main idea prevalent throughout the ENTIRE paper, not just any one part. Hope this helps! :)

  6. silversmithing says:

    Women have tons of rights in the United States(insert comma here) right? Women didn’t always have that many rights in America. Back(The word back is not necessary) before the 1900’s, women only had the right to marry and (insert “too”)give birth to children. Many women worked hard to get the same rights as men. There was one significant woman who worked extremely hard…Susan B. Anthony. She was truly the most influential person we studied in American history this year. Would women have the same rights if it weren’t for her?Anthony spoke at campaigned for women’s property rights in New York, spoke at meetings and collected signatures for petitions. Susan B. Anthony attended her first ever women’s rights convention in Syracuse(what state?). Anthony was introduced to Elizabeth Cady Stanton. Together, they founded the American Equal Rights Association. They began working on The Revolution(a newspaper) in Rochester, NY. Their logo was ‘Men their rights, and nothing more. Women their rights, and nothing less’. In 1869, Anthony and Stanton founded the National Women’s Suffrage Association(NWSA). It was an organization dedicated to gaining women’s suffrage. In the early years of NWSA Anthony tried to unite women into the labor movement. Anthony campaigned for women’s suffrage on speaking tours in the west. On November 18, 1872, Anthony was arrested for illegally voting in the 1872 Presidential Election. Anthony was tried and convicted 7 months later. She was fined but refused to pay the bail. The trial gave Anthony the opportunity to get her voice heard to a wider audience than ever before. There were two women’s suffrage organizations, NWSA and American Women Suffrage Association(AWSA)merged together forming the NAWSA. Anthony campaigned in the west to make sure that territories that gave women the right to vote, hadn’t blocked them from the union. Susan B. Anthony died 14 years, 5 months and 5 days before the 19th amendment passed. The 19th amendment gave women the right to vote. It(Insert apostraphie)s also known as the Susan B. Anthony Amendment. To remember Anthony, she is now on our $1 coin.Other than the few mistakes I made note of it is a very good essay.

  7. mycologically says:

    It’s too informal and needs more research