Is My Thesis Good For My Essay?

I am writing a compare/contrast essay on two poems (The death of the Ball Turret Gunner by Jarrell and Channel Firing by Thomas Hardy)I had a hard time with my Thesis. This is what I came up with:THESIS: In "The Death of the Ball Turret Gunner", war is portrayed as death waiting to happen to a person, while in "Channel Firing", war may allow some survivors out, but it’s the "afterlife" one should worry about, and not death itself. However, both poems strongly explain that a person’s life means nothing when it comes to war.Is this a good thesis?

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3 Answers to “Is My Thesis Good For My Essay?”

  1. rickshas says:

    In a thesis, you don’t want to talk about the two pieces you are comparing, that’s what the rest of the essay is for. You want it to be a broad statement about all of life. So the connection needs to be stated as a fact. NEVER start out a thesis with “In (name of piece)…” Ex) In “The Death of the Ball Turret Gunner”So write it like this maybeWar is portrayed as death waiting to happen, but in some cases while war may allow some survivors, its the afterlife one should worry about. I’m not saying that what I wrote is good writing, I’m just using the words you used. A Thesis is a statement (as in, one sentence) so keep it short. It’s basically just saying what the entire paper will be about. Remember in a paper with a thesis statement, EVERYTHING and EVERY sentence should reconnect right back to the thesis. So if you’re writing an entire paper, remember that all your commentaries should lead the reader back to the point of the thesis. Try using a variety of word choice. Purchase a thesaurus maybe or use [external link] to get rich words. Try to sound older than you are. I really hope I helped. I’m actually writing a thesis right now for my english class. :) Good luck xoxoxo

  2. floorings says:

    My teacher always says treat the reader like they are stupid and don’t know anything. Your thesis was well written, but try clarifying the first sentence, it sounds a bit confusing.In “The Death of the Ball Turret Gunner”, war is portrayed as immediate death, while in “Channel Firing”, one can avoid death, however, it’s the “afterlife” one should worry about, and not death itself. Both poems have a moral that strongly explains that a person’s life means nothing when it comes to war.Not perfect, but your thesis is pretty good.

  3. anc says:

    sounds pretty good to me:)