I’d like to share a story that has happened to me; i need help getting over her?





"If a system at equilibrium is subjected to a change of pressure, temperature, or the number of moles of a component, there will be a tendency for a net reaction in the direction that reduces the effect of this change." In this essay I intend to give an example of when my equilibrium was disrupted. When I was fifteen years old my life was perfect. I had an incredible relationship with God, I had loving parents, and five sweet sisters. My life seemed so perfect, I had not one care in the world. I finished my freshman year of school with A’s and B’s in every subject, and it seemed as if I was on top of the world. Right after school ended however, my life would change. Something would happen that would change my whole view on life, it would change me into the person I am today. On June 21st, 2008 I left with my best friend to go to the outer banks in North Carolina. We were staying for 1 week. We had rented a beach house directly on the water and everything was completely perfect. I had been working out of course and I thought I had a pretty killer body, and I was completely siked about surfing and just chilling without my parents for a whole week. I’d never been so free before. Right when we got there I noticed there were 4 girls staying right across the street from us. It was a nice side attraction I thought, but I really didn’t think much of it. I had never had a girl friend before, and I didn’t think I had much of a chance getting one at the time. So after we unpacked my best friend and I went out to the water. The water was chilly but felt nice considering it was about 98 degrees on the beach. My friend, his 13 year old brother and I decided to play Marco pollo. What a mistake. I was chosen to be it. As I was wandering around in the water turns out the four girls from across the street came down to the beach. I had no clue. My friend’s little brother (Corbin) decided he wanted to be funny, so he got behind the most attractive of all the girls and said Pollo! He just stood behind her. So I swam as fast as I could to get to him. Eyes closed the whole time. I smacked directly into her not realizing it was a girl, I thought it was Corbin. So tackled her and then picked her up and dunked her underwater. Then I opened my eyes. I was embarrassed as a guy could get, and that is where my life started to change. I went to the house after the incident, I was to embarrassed even to talk. However when I was sitting on the porch the girl came up to me. She invited me over to her house to play monopoly. I was flattered. I didn’t know what to say. I had never really even talked to a girl before, besides my sisters. So she just read my face and took it as a yes. I met her at her house at 5pm. I brought Colin(my best friend) and Corbin. We hung out and chatted. I left with a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn’t sleep that night. I couldn’t get her off my mind. I spent every moment of the next few days with her. We went on long walks in the sun set. She always talked and I would listen, and let me tell you, she could talk. She could talk for hours, but strangely enough, I felt as if it was perfect. I loved her voice. The days passed so quickly. On Wednesday, June 25th, 2008, we went on a walk at 7pm. The sun was just starting to set, it was a perfect scene. This time however she didn’t say a word. She just stared at me. Then she broke down in tears. She grabbed my hand (first time anyone had ever held my hand) and she apologized to me. I was speechless, I didn’t understand why she was apologizing. She told me she already had a boy friend and that she had been leading me on this whole time. She said she cared a lot about me and that she would like to spend the rest of her life with me, but she was already committed. I didn’t say one word. I could only stand there. I felt like my heart was ripped out. For the first time I found a girl I liked, and she liked me back, but it was a forbidden love. I had never felt so alone. All this passed through my head in the minutes I stood silent there on the beach. Her hand still in mine. After what seemed like hours I finally spoke. I laughed actually trying to ease the tension. I said, " You know Sydney, this isn’t your fault. This is just my luck messing with me again." I couldn’t help but laugh at myself. She just stood there, unable to respond. Then her friends came and she went back to her house. I stayed up that night. I was unable to eat, drink, or even think straight. I didn’t understand. If she liked me, why would she be with anyone else. Things didn’t make sense in my 15 year old head. All I knew was that she deserved to be happy, no matter what. After about 11pm. I went out on the front porch. It faced Sydney’s house. She was already sitting out there. She had been since around 9, but I just couldn’t go out there and face her before now. I went and sat on the rail. I faced her. She was bent over crying. I could hear her from all the way across



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One Answer to “I’d like to share a story that has happened to me; i need help getting over her?”

  1. unwariness says:

    Thank you for sharing your story–it was well told. If I may, you seem very methodical in your approach to life. Everything from the way you assessed how ‘perfect’ your life was prior to this incident (i.e. grades, family, friends, etc) to the thorough nature of the story’s retelling. You seem like you are one who prides themselves on being diligent in all that they do and generally ahead of the curve when it comes to completing tasks. The resulting satisfaction is one that basically stems from having control of your life and the various moving parts it contains.I believe that your experience rocked you so much because it represents a complete loss of control (which, to some extent, really is what love is all about). Not only did your emotions dominate your behavior (i.e. loss of control), but then it turns out that everything you had assumed re: Sydney turned out to be untrue (another loss of control). And most likely, the fact that you are still thinking about her is yet another form of loss of control.Control of our own destinies is something all of us strive for and in some cases, many of us obsess over. Unfortunately, the nature of life (as one generally learns as they get older) is that there are many, many things in life that we don’t control. If a loved one gets sick or if a random accident occurs to you or to someone you know, it can throw a huge wrench into the harmony of your life . . . unfortunately, however, that is the nature of life itself. To use the cliche, to really accept life for what it is, one must ‘expect the unexpected’ and realize that things can happen at any time that may disrupt the sense of harmony that we had at that moment.The quality of one’s life is really determined when you compare their actual life to the life they expected themselves to have. If you expect complete harmony in life, any disharmony becomes very intrusive and materially affects the quality of your life. However, if you realize that things may come along at any time that are not ideal, life’s little surprises may end up affecting you a lot less. Hope this helps in some way.